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The best thing you can say in this situation is simply, "I'm here for you." In a way, supporting a divorcing friend is not unlike supporting a grieving friend, because divorce—even if she wanted it, even if it's relatively amicable—evokes similar feelings of loss."She needs your support and friendship more than anything else," says Swann.The easiest way to provide support is to take your cues from her: If she wants to just spend time with you without talking about her ex, do that.If she needs a few late-night sessions to vent and work through her grief, be there for her.You may find that your friend is in tighter financial straits immediately after her divorce, particularly if she was a stay-at-home mom during the marriage, or has had to move because she could no longer afford the mortgage.This sudden change in lifestyle may make her retreat a bit more from her social life.Reassure them that their parents still love them, and that the divorce is absolutely, positively not their fault (often a child's biggest fear or suspicion).
A good friend just told you that she's getting a divorce and you don't know the right way to respond.If she declines to go out, try to be sensitive to her situation and generous when you can, says Swann.Dream up different things to do together that don't involve spending cash, such as nature walks, free concerts and dinners at home.If she just wants a little company, offer to take her along on your morning walks or to the gym; come by with coffee (or a bottle of wine! Don't forget she may need practical help, too: Offer to drive her kids places or ask your husband to help out with chores like mowing the lawn or getting the oil changed in her car, suggests Swann.Your sister is getting a divorce, but you think she's making a mistake.